She is not a prop for you to use or an idea for you to project your desires upon. She is not here to fulfill your sexual wishes like some kind of deviant genie. When she displays her naked body or her sexy and explicit thoughts, it’s not an invention for you to treat her with anything less than dignity and respect. Just because a woman feels comfortable enough to take ownership of her sexuality and revel in the delight in exploring it, does not mean she wants to explore it with you or be subjected to your unsolicited demands.
Sexual beings are human beings. Some of us like dark and wicked shit that includes humiliation and violence. But not from strangers. To explore BDSM, one must trust the one they are exploring it with and that trust must be earned. To try and skip that process doesn’t make you aggressive or confident, it makes you ignorant and pathetic.